


Reading Rainbow

by Anonfeather



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Coming Out, Internalized Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-01 12:55:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18800782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonfeather/pseuds/Anonfeather
Summary: Book discutions with a new friend leads to revealing a secret.





	Reading Rainbow

**Author's Note:**

> I like madilton, but I keep writing them fighting, or being exes or turn it bittersweet. So I wanted to do some fluff for this pairing :). It’s actually more friendshippy than romance thought…. And it’s not really that fluffy. I failed!
> 
> Warning/Tags/Content: internalized homophobia, forced coming out (private)

James’ dorm room opened with a bang. It gave him a heart attack until he gathered that there wasn’t a home invasion. He returned his attention to his homework, feigning coolness in front of the person that invited himself in.

“You should have told me this book was GOOD!” Said Alexander Hamilton. They shared a lot of the same classes in college and worked together on a few group projects without wishing to kill the other. In the right light, they could call themselves friends.

Alexander dropped on his bed, hugging the life out of the book. He happily skimmed the book’s content, squealing over favorites scenes and cooing at how great the novel was and how his whole existence had been changed ever since touching to relic. 

James smiled, a soft one instead of his neutral social forced one, at the sight. “I did tell it was good. That’s why I lent it to you.”

Alexander stood on the bed, bouncing aggressively with a pointed finger. “You said it was good. Not that it was  _ good _ !”

James laughed at the antics. “What?”

“You didn’t hype the book! You just went, _ ‘yeah, this thing. It’s good’  _ and not ‘ _ O-M-G, you have to read this shit! It’s gonna rock your world and you won’t sleep a wink because you’ll NEED to finish in one go so you’ll down eight cuppas of joe in an hour to get you through the night reading this marvel _ .”

“Alex- did you drink eight cups of coffee and pull an all nighter to read?”

“I plead the fifth!” He yelled, continuously bouncing on his bed. He was more hyper than usual. 

James sent a silent prayer for his neighbor and added: “You should read the sequel.”

“THERE’S A SEQUEL?!” Alexander broke and flopped on the bed, unable to contain his blown mind. 

James handed over the said sequel to the other boy, poking him with it until he revived. Like a shark Alexander pulled it down to its death, holding it close to his heart, moaning in torment that he needed to read it NOW but at the same time being too tired to start and he’d die of fatigue if he dared to turn the first page. 

“Poor baby,” James said sarcastically. His smile was still wide. 

“Dude, this book is now my wife. I could kiss you for introducing me.”

The comment made his smile fade. “Please, don’t say things like that.”

“Like what? That I want to marry an inanimate object?”

“N-no, about kissing me. We’re both guys, it’s not … right.”

Alexander tried to decipher what James was actually saying. What it a joke or was he… “Your an effing homophobe?!”

If there was one thing Alexander couldn’t tolerate it was intolerance and hate! He thought he’d made a new friend of campus, never before he thought that calm and timid little James could hide some nasty evil in his core. He was ready to deck the guy if his next words weren’t carefully chosen.

“N-no!” James quickly denied. “It’s not that. I — Never mind. Please. I’m sorry.”

The apology lessen his need for violence, but not his anger. He kept glaring - there was no way he’d let the subject drop. He had to know right here and now if he kept this friendship.

“I want to know why you think it’s not right! Don’t tell me you never noticed my flag or that you don’t know its meaning?” Alexander always made sure his pride pin was securely attached and visible. James was astute — he knew he saw it.

“I - please -”

“No, I’m getting to the bottom of this. Spill.”

James was flustered, looking at the ground hoping that he’d find a way to escape the conversation. Sadly, Alexander was laser focus more so than a dog on steak.

“I, I, only wanted to say, that _ I _ shouldn’t get kissed by guys. But, it’s okay for you… for other people to be with or whoever they want,” James said.

Alexander’s glare lessened as he gathered the words. “So — people are allowed to be gay, as long as it’s not near you.”

“As long as it’s not me,” James softly mumbled.

“Dude, gay doesn’t get caught. I could hold your hand and you wouldn't suddenly turn gay!” Alexander figured he was finally catching on. It was a classic case of ignorance. He shouldn't be surprised what with James coming from Virginia and all that. 

“I know you can’t catch it!” James snapped taking Alexander by surprised. “It’s something you're born with; you can’t choose. I wasn’t my choice, but -” He closed up immediately, hand on mouth in shock. He tensed, he trembled, he wanted to cry. 

“Wait, wait…” Alexander pieced together. “Are you saying you’re gay?”

Quick to deny, James shook his head. As long seconds passed, but finally gave a microscopic nod. 

“Oh, man! You should have told me sooner!” Alexander beamed with joy, gathering up his fellow in his arms. James stiffened until Alexander remembered the other’s man discomfort to physical touch. He pulled away, yet part of him still wanted to hold James. He looked so distraught with tears welling up.“Sorry I gave you a hard time. I — You should be proud of who you are.”

“I can’t — I shouldn’t be,” James was openly crying now. “Please, please don’t tell anybody.”

It wasn’t in Alexander’s value to hide himself. However, he knew he had to respect his friend’s wish until and if he was ready to face the world. “Yeah, okay sure. I’m sure if you want to talk about it. About anything.”

“Right now, let’s talk about the book, okay?” James pushed a meek smile. A distraction was needed and Alexander was more than willing to give it as he picked his most recent cherished novel, ready to sing it’s praise until death or sleep takes him.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Anyways.. I guess somewhere down the line, Alex asks James out on a date. James accepts because he's been crushing on Alex ever since he meet him. They keep it on the downlow until James is ready to come out in a few months. I don't know if anyone would like to read it, but I'd write it if if peeps are into it :D


End file.
